I struggled with what to title this post even though I know exactly what I want to say. Sometimes I notice things or patterns or trends about people, eating, food, or whatever and say to myself “I need to write about that”. Especially when it is something I see over and over again. To me it may be glaringly obvious how ridiculous it is yet so many wise and wonderful people are still doing the same dumb things (I don’t mean to be insulting to anyone as they are not “dumb” at all, which is why it is so baffling they might make the same mistakes over and over, even after many years).

I am referring to dieting, specifically spending money to go on the same diet program they may have been “successful” on 2 years ago. Lately I have bumped into old friends or acquaintances who last time I saw them looked a whole lot different. It could go either way, either they may have gained a lot of weight or lost a lot of weight. Following the same “program”. Or not.

It seems they have so much faith in their diet program because after all, it did “work”. If only they could have stayed with it, had more willpower. So this next time should be the last. But it never is and the reason is because nothing has really changed except the number on the scale (down, then up). You have heard it before, from me and others, why dieting and focusing on your weight is not the answer to feeling good or being healthy…..you know that any new diet book hooks you in because it gives a false sense of hope.

Instead, my hope is you might be open to stopping for just a few minutes to reflect on this. Do you have a goal stuck in your brain that you absolutely will not give up until you reach a certain size or weight? Then I am asking you for just a few minutes to let go of that thought and think about all of the things you have done over the past months or years to change your body. If you have spent months or years working on this and are still in the same place, would you consider something different? You could go another few years repeating the cycle and many people do. And you should not be hard on yourself if you have, because that is the only way to learn (and learning what does not work is equally important as learning what does work). Just like with dating, you have to kiss a lot of frogs!

Anyway, my suggestion is putting on a “detective” hat instead. Instead of judging and commanding yourself, could you first of all try to stay neutral and nonjudgmental? What are some of the unhealthy habits you may have fallen into that you wish you could change? For instance, are you stopping for fast food on the way home from work on a daily basis? Do you plop on the couch the minute you get home? Do you notice you drink too much when you go out with certain friends or overeat when you have sweets in your house? How about considering some simple “health” goals and making a mental list of some of the healthy things you would like to incorporate in your life? Someone once told me, or maybe I read it somewhere, that you are either moving forward, backward, or staying still. It is ok to stay still sometimes. And we learn from going backwards too. But why not take some simple steps to “move forward” instead of starting that same old diet plan or program (or a new one) that will leave you in the same place a year from now? You may decide to pick just one day where you don’t stop for fast food and cook instead. You may just decide to collect some of those healthy recipes you actually did enjoy from that diet plan and cook dinner (even if you are not “on” the diet, if you found healthy meals you liked, that could be useful!). Or maybe you may decide to take just ten minutes after work to walk before you settled in to watch TV. Even just one day a week. It is all positive action and all with a good goal: to move into a healthier lifestyle. Yes, you can stop for fast food, overeat with your friends, drink too much sometimes, and decide to spend the entire day on the couch if that is what you need. It is finding the balance that leads to a healthy body and mind. In the end, you will probably find that a year from now, for once, you will be in a better place, both physically and mentally (and financially!).

So consider putting on that detective hat, think about YOUR unique lifestyle and habits, and YOU decide what you may want to start with to move FORWARD. One step at a time…..